Parenting in Islam

 

Parenting as a world view is fostering a child to meet the cultural standard whereas Islam focuses on raising and preparing a child into the best possible character with a firm eeman and strong ‘aqeedah. It is a combination of equal parts of authority and responsibility along with accountability to Allah SWT.  Authority can only be used best when parents are highly demanding and highly responsive. This condition is met by the Authoritative style of parenting.

Accountability of parenting

Authoritative parenting is focused on the welfare of children and parents take actions, make rules, and give punishments for their sake. As an accessory to authority, it is the responsibility of a parent to perform their essential duties of parenting, for which they will be questioned. Allah mentions in (Qur’an, 66:6), 

“O you who believe, protect yourselves and your families from a fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe.”

Loving your children

This style of parenting gives attention and warmth to children. It understands their emotional needs. Parents are obliged to raise a happy, responsible, self-reliant child, one who is achievement-oriented and one who helps as well as supports their peers and adults.  A child should be Allah conscious and have an understanding of Islam. Allah SWT has made children a gift for parents; children are an adornment of this life. Nurturing pious children can be a source of reward for parents as they are “comfort of the eyes” as mentioned in Surah Furqan, v47.

Having high demands from children

It is the purpose of parenting to raise children with a love for Allah and fear of him. Love and fear make it easy to protect one from what is forbidden and enjoin what is encouraged. Parents should demand Islamic practices from their children; parents should teach them Islamic principles.  Parents have the authority to take decisions ingrained in the parent-child relationship and to tell the child what to do and expect them to comply. Authority relationships help to the main order.

Punishing children to educate them

    Islam suggests consistent fair punishments to reform a child; this includes light beating for immediate action, alienating, and admonition. It must be highlighted here that in Islam corporal punishment is highly disliked. Allah has only allowed parents to hit their children when the children neglect their prayers, even so a slap to the face is highly disliked and against the sunnah and ethics of Islam. Parents are first asked to teach with reason.